“At Stonewall, we know many gay men are dads. But we also know that many more think becoming a dad is beyond their reach. With this groundbreaking new guide, Stonewall aims to show that there are many ways of being a gay dad and encourage those who might have written off the prospect to re-consider”

Recently concluding a study, Different Families, with Cambridge University that included interviews with the children of gay parents, observations from children with gay dads did highlight a difference from other families, but not always in the way you might think with four-year-old Alfie seeing his family as different to his friends’ families ‘because it’s more nicer and more…better.’

However whilst this does show some change in society’s perceptions of gay parented families, the research did demonstrate homophobia was still an issue with some children of gay dads experiencing homophobic bullying in school, including William, 15, who spoke of his problems with homophobia at his Catholic school:

“‘I wasn’t happy to go to school because I knew it would happen”

whilst his sister Lauren, 17, said she’d experienced homophobia from teachers who discouraged her to focus on gay issues for a project:

‘My teacher said, can you stay off the whole gay topic – we’re a Catholic school.’

The study also highlighted it wasn’t just an issue at secondary school, with Sian, 9 saying: ‘I wish that people didn’t be rude about gay people.’, whilst Mark, 8, said he was teased about it: ‘They say I know what gay means, it’s two naked men dancing around on a boat.’

Are you a gay dad through fostering, adoption, surrogacy, co-parenting or you have children from a previous relationship, Stonewall would like to hear from you to help with case studies for their forthcoming guide on gay dads.If you are please contact ilana.seager@stonewall.org.uk

It’s Mothers Day on Sunday and as Stonewall has reported a huge amount has happened for lesbian mums over the last 12 months.

Ranging from groundbreaking legal changes via the Human Embryology and Fertilisation Act to Stonewall releasing it’s plain English guide for lesbians on how to get pregnant, 2010 sees life for lesbian mums of the future being easier and fairer than it has ever been before.

The most significant change to occur is that concerning the non birth mother. This time last year if you weren’t the one having the baby then you weren’t going to be recognised as being part of the relationship unless you adopted the child. Now as long as you’re civil partnered, or have conceived your child through a licensed fertility clinic you can be named on the birth certificate.

The next legal chance that makes it easier for lesbian couples to seek fertility treatment is that which has removed the requirement for ‘the need for a father’, replacing it instead with ‘the need for supportive parenting’. This now means there need be no fear of discrimination from these clinics when you and your partner are looking to conceive.

Now we don’t know about you but we think this all makes one pretty good Mothers Day present, and here’s hoping we’ll have even more to celebrate on Mothers Day in 2010!

“I want him to be successful as a human being. I want my son to be able to talk to me. I’m with him, I wanted that son. If he’s a gay person, he’s not any less of my son, or any less happy for that.”

And just in case you’re not sure that this diva truly understands about gay people and gay left, then her description of gay people should rid you of any such worries, with Ms Dion saying

“You know what, I think gay people know how to have fun! And if you can’t have a good time and just play, it’s not worth it. You have to have a good time.”

Oh if you don’t think Celine Dion knows how to have fun then you’re very much mistaken, because this is a lady who definitely knows how to enjoy herself… particularly with dancing flowers and their trumpets.

For years there’s been debate about whether gay and lesbian couples can ever be as good parents as heterosexual couples, and finally with the release of Lesbian and Gay Parents and Their Children: Research on the Family Life Cycle by Dr Abbie E Goldberg, a book-length review and analysis of research carried out on the parenting of child by gay and lesbians parents we might be able to finally put these questions to sleep.

Designed to be both a comprehensive summary and analysis of the research that has been done on gay and lesbian parents and their families to date, this book begins in the 1970s and works right up to the present day.

And it’s conclusion? Well for the gay and lesbian world, it’s very positive. Research seems to suggest, as many of us would have predicted, that children raised by gay and lesbian parents end up being no different in terms of well being than heterosexual couples.

So why had Dr. Goldberg decided to find the findings as a book and not just another paper?  Well she says she has done it as a response to the growing awareness about both equality in terms of marriage and gay parenting, and with it  the lack of any one source of information that has brought together, and analysed the many research projects that have been done to show the impact same sex parenting can have.

But why should we listen to what  Abbie E. Goldberg, PhD,  has to say? Well there’s a number of reasons why. Having earned her docorate in clinical psychology, alongside her M.S in, Psychology from the University of Massachusetts at Amherst, Dr. Goldberg has spent a lot of time of research time focusing on these very issues, with lesbian parent families being a focus on her work on the  transition to parenthood in diverse families, as well as being a feature of her look into how gender and sexual orientation figure into individuals’ adjustment and experience of parenthood. Add to this her work in studying the experiences of adults raised by lesbian, gay, and bisexual parents, and I think you could definitely say this is a woman more than qualified to effectively analyse studies in this area.

And for the looks of the topics that she goes into, this is a book that sparks my interest, (but hey I’m a Social Policy graduate) with all areas of the family family life cycle studied, from how same sex couples met and formed healthy relationships to how they then decided to have children and the parental roles they would adopt. On top of this, Goldberg also looks at the sadder end of the cycle such as divorce/relationship dissolution in lesbian/gay-parent households as well as a focus on the children, including the perspectives of non-heterosexual children of lesbian/gay parent, which sees discussion by both children now, and those who are now adults.

Combining  both qualitative and quantitative research, this book covers a huge range of social science disciplines, including psychology, sociology, sexuality/gender studies, and human development to produce a depth of analysis   that looks beyond what these studies have found, to offer insights and highlight the potential implications these findings could have on policy making, as well as offering more general understanding to those dealing with same sex parenting, whether it be as a parent, a school official or even a therapist.

The Lesbian and Gay Parents and Their Children: Research on the Family Life Cycle is available at the APA Books website.

Photo by bobster855